HERD in the aisles – Chuckles from Day 3 Outdoor Retailer Summer Market 2007

Previously published in the OR Daily, we bring you more musings from the SNEWS® Herd from Day 3 of Outdoor Retailer Summer Market 2007 for your eye-rolling and momentary “snickering” pleasure…

>> In the “we thought we’d seen it all” category comes yet another report from the men’s room near the south end of the Convention Center. One of our intrepid reporters, while trying to maintain men’s room etiquette by staring at the tile directly in front of him could not help but notice a very busy person standing right next door, conducting business with both hands – yes, he was staring into a Blackberry dangerously close to infringing on our reporter’s personal space. Even more stunning, he was literally texting AND responding with the one hand while (our reporter presumes) taking care of personal business with the other. You could hear the snickers as others noticed and walked over to the sinks shaking their heads. People! Talking on a cell phone whilst taking a leak or conducting other such personal business in a toilet is both obnoxious and wrong, but engaging in active text messaging while peeing is simply ludicrous. We do point out that the word restroom begins with, yes, the word rest. Meaning, give your damn phones and Blackberries a rest for a few minutes. Trust us on this one…you’re really not so important that a few minutes off your phone in a bathroom will change the world one way or another.

>> Someone commented on an attendee’s shirt as really cool and he noted that it was completely, 100 percent recycled material, even the buttons. Biting on the set-up, he got the “Who makes it and where can I buy one,” query. His reply: “Thrift store — $4.” Which makes us wonder if there is a business opportunity that’s being overlooked. Buy $4 – $5 shirts at the thrift stores, mark ’em up, sell them as the greenest thing on the market. Why not? There are certainly more ludicrous green claims out there.

>> Summer Market attracts all kinds, including professional schwag hunters. At the Outdoor Demo at the GoLite booth we overheard a conversation between a GoLite employee and one such schwagmeister. The schwager kept insisting he had won a particular contest because there was only himself and another person there at the booth at the appointed time. The GoLite employee gently explained that the contest was a two day contest and just because our schwagmeister was there bright and early on day one to enter the contest does not mean he was a winner until results were tallied on day two. He left grumbling and heading off to another booth to score more booty…like maybe a brain?

>> Small suggestion to non-U.S. companies exhibiting at Outdoor Retailer – invest in a translator whose mother tongue is English. It will help you to avoid silliness like the large sign in front of one of the many meeting rooms serving as booth space which reads, “We welcome you to visit Taiwan Pavilion.”

>> And finally…

John Sterling of the Conservation Alliance and Adrienne Graf of The Forest Group face off in costume for the Uphill Challenge. Why, we’re not sure, other than perhaps a sick need to up the ante in terms of sweat lost in the shortest period of time. Of this we are sure…no one wants to ever wear those costumes again…trust us.

Our Herd is always standing by for your humorous, ridiculous, off-beat, whacky, and most certainly irreverent tips and emails (photos are absolutely encouraged) to add to our popular The HERD SNEWS® Chat postings. And “shhhhhhh,” your secret is safe with us. Sources are never revealed, naturally. Send an email to the SNEWS® HERD team with all the nifty details at Herd@snewsnet.com.